I want to be able to walk down the street in a tank top and short shorts and have men think “Oh, she’s wearing that because it’s hot,” and not “she’s wearing that to show her willingness to have sex.”
I want to be able to eat an entire bag of potato chips without feeling the need to qualify it with “I’m such a fat kid” or “I’m such a loser.” I actually think anyone who loves potato chips as much as I do is pretty damn cool. And I think maybe everyone else sort of identifies with me, because potato chips are delicious.
I want to be able to watch a TV show without having to deal with slut shaming, racism, homophobia, and general bigotry and ignorance. I want to see a Black Dr. Who, a gay season of the Bachelor, and I think Lucy Liu is a fantastic choice for Watson. The only thing better would be if Queen Latifah was Sherlock. And they were lesbians. That lead singer from La Roux could be Lestrade. The old spice guy is clearly the perfect Irene Adler.
I want to be able to point out flaws in popular TV shows, movies, and music videos, without people jumping down my throat for “ruining” things. I don’t really understand this logic, because I feel like it’s just like saying, “if I don’t know about it, it doesn’t exist. And therefore, it is perfect.”
I want to be able to get a higher education without getting into over $100K in debt. I’m in law school and I’m on probation for a scholarship at a school I went to PRIMARILY BECAUSE THEY GAVE ME THE MOST FINANCIAL AID. I want schools to just be honest and fair when it comes to money, actually. Giving me honest statistics and a realistic expectation of my GPA wold have been nice.
I want not only a fat Disney Princess, I want a queer, woman of color, non-normative bodied Disney Princess/Prince. I think if Disney can create entire narratives around fucking clown fish, they should be able to handle a walking, talking human being. Although, it would be nice if said Disney Princess had a talking dildo as a conscience instead of jiminy cricket. What the fuck was that shit anyways? What does a bug know about fucking right or wrong? And where did he get that *ahem* fly suit?
I want white people to understand that there is a happy medium between being colorblind and being bigoted and that those two states of mind are simply the two extremes on the scale of racism. I want to be able to acknowledge my POC status without having to explain myself to people. I want to be able to call myself an American, AND an Asian American. I want people to understand that I am not white, but not treat me as if being not-white is somehow a crutch and/or the most important thing about me. Basically, I want white people to realize what they did wrong in the past and fix it. But to never forget why society ended up so fucking race-oriented in the first place.
I want a diet soda that fills me with energy but doesn’t fill me with high fructose corn syrup. I also want it to be lychee flavored. And I want it to come in pretty colors.
I want Orangina to come out with a line of sorbets/ice creams, Coke to come out with a line of flavored vodkas, and oreo to sell its delicious cream filling by the can.
I want a tampon that can be entirely flushed down the toilet without me worrying about clogging it. All the parts. The wrapping, the applicator, the actual cottony bit. And I want it to not be made out of cardboard, because cardboard applicators were invented by somebody who clearly failed to consider the weird ability cardboard has to simultaneously melt and get soggy AND give you paper cuts.
I want bubble bath that does not increase the chances that I will get a UTI. Also, can it be like the stuff in Harry Potter, that lasts for a really long time and can support a human body? that would be great.
Actually, I just sort of want every food mentioned in Game of Thrones, Harry Potter, and Roald Dahl to be readily available at the nearest convenience store.
I want a prequel to the Harry Potter series.
I want a Neil Gaiman channel on Pandora. Alan Moore can come too.
I want a teleportation device, hair dye for darker hair that doesn’t require bleach, and pillows that never go flat.
I want to be comfortable and happy and hardworking and not broke and not worried about the state of my parent’s finances because I feel like I’m a huge drain on them.
I want everybody to have access to affordable and convenient healthcare. I also want everybody to be able to have whatever type of mutually consensual sex they want. And I definitely think that everybody should be able to wear whatever the fuck they want without people assume things about their sexuality, their sex drive, or their sexual history. And I want everybody to be able to walk down the street at 3 am without worrying about anything. Because 3 AM is a pretty magical time if you ever have the chance to be outside.
I want to feel like the world is full of potential and possibility and choices, instead of impossible dreams, dead ends, and status quos.
AND MOST OF ALL, I WANT TO BE ABLE TO SAY WHAT I WANT WITHOUT SOCIETY TELLING ME, “WELL THAT’S TOO BAD, YOU DON’T ALWAYS GET WHAT YOU WANT.”
This whole thing is utterly amazing. And this part:
I think Lucy Liu is a fantastic choice for Watson. The only thing better would be if Queen Latifah was Sherlock. And they were lesbians. That lead singer from La Roux could be Lestrade. The old spice guy is clearly the perfect Irene Adler.
would be the most amazing thing ever and I am bereft that we’ll never have it.
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